Posted by Bama Hager, PhD on August 23, 2010

Bama Hager is the Autism Society of Alabama Policy Advisor, as well as a parent a child on the autism spectrum. The following is an excerpt from an article Bama wrote for Montgomery Parent Magazine. Purchase the next issue to read the entire article.

This article focuses on some of the preliminary tasks involved in parenting a child with ASD.  My son was diagnosed with autism eight years ago when he was two years-old.  I also parent a typically developing daughter.  I think of parenting on the Autism Spectrum as an extreme form of parenting much like the popular extreme sports are a form of traditional sports.

Consistency and Predictability. As parenting on the Autism Spectrum may be an intensified version of parenting a child who is neurotypical, guidelines for effective parenting of both populations are similar.  All children thrive when they develop in an environment where they are respected, regarded and loved.  When the environment is consistent and predictable, children can explore, create, develop and learn.  Parents of children with ASD may benefit from evaluating and monitoring the home environment in regards to consistent consequences and predictable routines.  

Pace and Protect Yourself. You are your child’s greatest asset.  Parents may benefit from remembering to pace and protect themselves.  Guard your time and protect your resources.  Parenting can be intense and draining.  It is important to take a break and rest.  Many parents realize that when they are refreshed and rested, they notice the positives of parenting more readily.  Parenting a child with ASD is very similar in this regard.  Parents of children with ASD may notice gains more easily if they are relaxed and rested.  It is often hard to take care of yourself as a caretaker of a child with Autism Spectrum Disorder, but it is essential to successful parenting.  

Avoid Therapy Fatigue. There are so many therapy options for children with ASD, that the choices for treatments can seem overwhelming to many parents.  Although there have been great strides in the development of therapies, there is no one best practices program that works for everyone.  So, parents have to pick and choose their therapies.  This can lead to a kind of “therapy fatigue,” when parents can feel tremendous pressure to provide everything available for their child in need.  It can’t be done.  No family can simultaneously attempt all available therapies.  Parents may benefit from prioritizing needs, then seeking treatment for the most urgent need. Many therapies will focus on more than one symptom of ASD, but it is often a good approach to match the child’s greatest need with the primary focus of therapy.  

Seek Support. Join the statewide advocacy group that represents your child’s disability.  Joining the Autism Society of Alabama by going to their website was my first step to advocating for my child.  I joined a group that could work on advocacy issues in my county and my state while I focused on my son’s therapy and school programs.  It also gave me an opportunity to network with other parents and learn about their successes.